


v e l o c i t y

by buckyownsmylife



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, Jealousy, Possibly monsters, Smut, a/b/o dynamics, age gap, but I can assure you: no cheating, death and death-related themes, definitely asshole!John for a while, no sad ending., some angst. This will be updated as the series progresses, some violence pertaining to the hunter world
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-29
Updated: 2021-03-09
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:07:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 14,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28412883
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/buckyownsmylife/pseuds/buckyownsmylife
Summary: The one where John’s your true mate, but he doesn’t want you to be.In a universe where fate grants you a new mate whenever you lose yours, John has lived quite comfortably for many years with the knowledge that he was alone after Mary. That all comes crumbling down the second that he meets you. How could the universe choose someone so young to be his omega?
Relationships: John Winchester/You
Comments: 44
Kudos: 43





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Here it is! After much support from my little discord family, I’ve decided to start posting my still uncompleted fics. That means that there won’t be a schedule for the updates and I have absolutely no idea when they will be done, but it also means y’all are free to bug me as much as you want and give me many ideas to keep the fic going! I hope y’all won’t mind the different approach, and if all goes well, I’ll start to post other multi-part fics that are still being written. It surely does help motivate me to keep writing!

Y/N’s P.O.V.  


I could see Bobby moving around from the corner of my eyes, but I felt too tired to even just stop focusing on the bottle of beer I was holding between my hands. People were all around us - actually, exclusively men, but I didn’t really know them and didn’t really care to introduce myself.

A feeling of loneliness had covered me, like a blanket I wasn’t too sure I would be able to push aside. Because the truth was, I was alone. Now that my dad was gone, I had no one to really count on.

Just then, I felt someone squeezing my shoulder and I forced myself to smile because I knew I was being unfair. I knew Bobby would never leave me alone, not when he was my godfather and had always cared so deeply for me. But that didn’t make any of this any less _hard._

Breathing deeply, I forced myself to get up from the couch and stretch my muscles before deciding to escape through the back door just so I could get a bit of fresh air out on the porch. Too many alphas in a single house and any unmated omega like myself would start to get crazy, even when we didn’t necessarily have any reason to feel threatened. So I stood there for a bit, looking out into the plain field, just pondering about what the future would hold for me until I heard a commotion coming from inside. 

Curious, I walked back into the living room just in time to see three men being warmly welcomed by the hunter community that had gathered in Bobby’s house tonight. I vaguely recognized the one who seemed to be the oldest, but his back was turned to me and so I could only really take notice of a well-used black jacket until a strong whiff of men’s cologne took over me and I felt like I was about to faint. What the hell was going on? My insides were hurting and I thought I was going to melt, so I held myself in a tight embrace in the hopes of keeping myself together when Bobby noticed me and while he tried to move me closer to the newcomers, probably intending to introduce me to them, the smell grew stronger and stronger until I was quite literally salivating to the aroma.

Bobby extended his arm to get the familiar man’s attention and I immediately stretched mine to wrap around his wrist, in need of support. “Bobby, I don’t feel so well.” I knew his head whipped to look at me but at the same time, the man turned around, and the last thing I remember before fainting was looking at eyes the color of honey.

It was already morning when I came to be. The sunlight softly penetrated the thin curtains on Bobby’s guest bedroom I was already familiar with and by the sight of it, I had been quite unceremoniously dropped over the still made bed, still wearing the same clothes from last night. That much was expected, not only since there wasn’t a single female in the house and I highly doubted Bobby would have let anyone see me naked, but also since yesterday’s reunion had a purpose. The hunters gathered in my godfather’s house had a strict timeline to follow, if they wanted to get rid of the vampires that had murdered my father.

So I didn’t think much about it, opting to get in the shower and wash away the sadness and confusion over yesterday’s events. I still wasn’t sure about what had happened - I certainly hadn’t ever fainted before -, but I supposed the heaviness of what I was going through had caught up to me. I hadn’t really been feeding myself properly either, I suddenly remembered. Yeah. That must have been it.

So I put on a yellow sundress that was my mother’s in the hopes that its color would cheer me up and prepared myself to get some breakfast, because by now I felt like my insides were clawing at me, begging me to get something to fill the hole inside of me. As soon as I closed the door to the room I was sleeping in, that smell hit me again. The same one that had threatened to suffocate me last night. What the fuck was going on? How did this perfume open up my already animalistic appetite?

By the time I reached the bottom of the stairs, I was certain I was wearing a scowl on my face, something I had never once before worn.

“Sweetheart…” Turning to my right, I found Bobby staring at me with a deep frown.

John’s P.O.V.

I watched Bobby try to get a hold of her from afar, and a small part of me felt smug about the fact that he feared what I would do if he touched what was mine. Then I remembered I didn’t care about this girl and made sure the best scowl I had was plastered on my face for when she looked at me.

It didn’t help that she smelled so… yummy. I wanted to eat her up whole. Still, I knew I couldn’t. Shouldn’t. Didn’t really want to - I forced myself to remember.

Fuck.

It had been too long since I’d had to deal with a mate and I forgot how strong the urge to bond can be. It didn’t help that this time I had two kids older than my omega trying not to laugh at me from behind their mugs.

“Stop that.” I slapped the back of Dean’s head, effectively making him spill a bit of coffee over his shirt, which in turn made me grin. Now we’re talking.

When my attention focused back on the girl and Bobby, they were a bit closer to each other, only on the other side of the living room, and they were talking in low voices. Suddenly, her eyes met mine and I felt it rise in me again, the need to pounce over there and dominate her.

But then she focused back on Bobby and I was left confused.

He was obviously explaining to her what had happened and that we were mates, so why didn’t she seem bothered by it? In fact, she looked as far from it as possible. If her expression was anything to go by, she was… bored?

Before long, they approached us again, and I was expecting her to throw herself at me or at least to acknowledge me as her mate in any way. That’s what I was prepared for. I knew what I was going to say to let her down as gently as possible. But what actually happened is that she went around the table and directly into the kitchen, turning on the stove.

“How about eggs and bacon for breakfast? Does anyone want some?” I swear I could hear fucking crickets singing outside, despite the fact that it was early morning. Was she really going to completely ignore me? “Hello? Eggs, bacon, answer me or you won’t be fed.” My boys jumped to action at the threat and I tried to make sense of what was happening while forcing myself to ignore just how cute she looked with her head tilted and a hand on her hip.

She cooked in silence then, not even granting me a look. I was beyond surprised by now. What the hell was I supposed to do about this?

As the plate of breakfast was laid in front of us, she took her seat next to Bobby, which just so happened to be to my left, but even then, she didn’t even glance at me, opting to munch on her food quietly. I took notice of the fact that she had a healthy appetite, instead of being one of those girls who tried to diet for the sake of impressing men, but my mind was still all over the place. 

“Aren’t you going to say anything to me?” The minute the words escaped my mouth, whatever conversation my boys had been trying to maintain with Bobby immediately died down. Still, she didn’t look at me. The little girl had the nerve to seem unfazed by my presence _and_ my question, even my irritation. She didn’t even raise her eyes to meet mine when she responded.

“Why should I?” The question caught me off guard, and the silence that followed revealed it to her. When no one intervened to break the ice, she chanced a glance up, her beautiful bright eyes meeting mine, and she sighed, at last dropping her cutlery before straightening up to talk to me. 

“I’m sorry if that came off rude, but the truth is… It’s very clear that you have absolutely no interest in me as an Alpha, and since it is _your_ responsibility to take care of me, even if it was to let me down gently, I don’t see why _I’m_ the one who has to take your feelings into consideration and pay you the attention you didn’t grant me.” 

God fucking damnit. She was already the most interesting woman I’d met in a very long time, and when I say a very long time, I mean way before she was born, when my wife - my first true mate - was still alive.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

John looked at a loss for words, and I took that as an indication that I could continue my meal without further idiotic demands. “Would you pass me the coffee, please?” I asked, pointing in the direction of the thermos, my eyes focused on my eggs. Dean reached out and poured some in my mug, which granted him a grateful smile.

“It’s huh… It’s very good coffee. Bobby tells me you’re the one who taught him how to make it like this.” That made me chuckle, and I chanced an amused glance to my godfather.

“Strong, you mean? Yeah, it’s the only way I know how to drink it.” Another uncomfortable silence. My absolute most hated thing. I quickly swallowed whatever food was left in my plate before pushing my chair away from the counter. “I have some stuff to do in the backyard… Leave the plates in the sink and I’ll clean them up when I get back. It was nice meeting you.” I nodded in their direction, stopping only to give a quick kiss on Bobby’s forehead, and left without another word or glance. 

I was only able to breathe again when the back door was closed behind me and I was already a few good feet from the house. Fuck. Suddenly, I felt the urge to cry, and I knew that despite the distress I had been put under the last few days, it wasn’t only the death of my father or the refusal from my mate that was making me sad. It was those stupid omega hormones, trying to force me to go back there and beg for a forgiveness I didn’t really want. 

Stupid fucking nature. I was stronger than that. I had to be. Even I had enough pride to stop me from throwing myself at the feet of someone who doesn’t want me. 

I tried to distract myself from whatever the hell could be going on inside the house while taking care of the few things I could do outside of it. Granted, there wasn’t much. But anything was better than being stuck in that place, having to smell that mixture of gunpowder, scotch, and cinnamon that made my head twirl. Fucking John Winchester and that delicious musk of his. I didn’t fucking need him.

It was with that thought that I popped open the hood of one of the cars Bobby and I had been working on, trying to focus on something other than my stupid body and its stupid wishes. After a few minutes of actually forcing myself to do so, I was finally able to zone out of my real-life drama and get lost in the world of carburetors and grease.

“Have you figured out what’s the problem with the engine?” The familiar voice brought a smile to my face, despite all of my current circumstances, and I found myself whipping around to stare at the boy towering over me. 

“Jess!” The young beta smiled at me, always as excited to see me as I was. He’d been living near Bobby for years now, and I’d watched him grow up throughout my visits to my godfather. Now, despite being a year younger than me, he stood five inches taller, towering over my figure whenever he stood near.

“Hey there! Visitors?” He nodded towards the Impala, and I gave him a tight-lipped smile. 

“Something like that. Bobby had some… friends over last night and those are the only ones left. They’re supposed to be leaving soon enough, though.” I returned my attention to the car’s motor but the lack of sound from my usually chipper companion made me raise my gaze up to him once more. “What?” I inquired, inadvertently already smiling as I waited for his question.

“Do you hate them or what?” Chuckling, I crouched to search for one of my tools before going back to work on the engine.

“Why the question?” I didn’t really mind answering it, I was always just curious about how Jess’ mind worked. I wanted to know if I had any major tells. As someone who had seen me practically every day for the last month, could he see that I’d met my mate? Had that encounter changed me somehow?

“You don’t seem very happy to talk about them. And you’re usually excited about everything and everyone.” The idea he had of me made me snort. I tended to be someone who saw the brighter side of life, that was true, but after my father’s death, I didn’t really think I’d been able to keep up that appearance. Guess I was wrong.

“I suppose you’re right.” That’s all I said, sending a quick smile his way before returning to the task at hand. Jess helped, giving me the tools I needed when I asked for them, and I absentmindedly listened to him babble about his last year of high school as I kept my focus on my manual work.

It was one of the reasons why I liked to help Bobby so much. When I was fixing a car, even if it was just a simple job, my mind was occupied with something else entirely. It was like my own form of meditation, only a bit dirtier.

I was almost able to forget about John Winchester and his stupid scent. Almost. If it weren’t for the periodical cramps that I tried to ignore in order not to alert my company - I definitely didn’t want to talk about it with Jess - I supposed I would have been able to forget about the Winchester men before they disappeared from my life forever.

That was, of course, until they left the house and gathered in the Impala, catching the attention of my very hyper friend. “Oh, wow. Those are Bobby’s friends? I can smell them even from here.

A very unattractive snort escaped me, and it caught Jess’ attention. “Tell me about it.”

“Oh, did they try to disturb you?” I had to smile to myself at how cute he sounded, so defensive for me. 

“Not really. I’m just glad that they’re gone.” And with one last look over my shoulder, just in time to watch John back up the Impala and leave, I added, “I hope I’ll never have to see them again.”


	2. Chapter 2

John’s P.O.V.

God fucking damn it. Just what the hell was going on back in Bobby’s house and why the hell wasn’t he picking up the phone?

For the first time since I left her behind, I found myself considering I should have at least given my omega - no, not my omega, just Y/N - enough attention to ask her for her number. At least it would have been handy in a time like this one, where my heart was pumping loudly, shortening my breathing, and making it difficult for me to focus. I just wanted to know what was going on, but there was no way I could tap into an unfulfilled bond to see what had scared Y/N so badly.

A sharp pang in my stomach had me abruptly turning the impala around and returning to the direction we had left behind two weeks before, much to the boys’ surprise. I made sure to ignore their open mouths and raised eyebrows, but I should know better than to hope that they’d quietly accept this change of plans.

“Where are we going?” Dean asked, while Sam rubbed off the sleep from his face.

“Back to Bobby’s,” I barked, and I knew that my tone didn’t allow for any follow-up questions. Still, Dean couldn’t help himself. He had been (sometimes not so) subtly teasing me about the girl, making jokes about how I probably wouldn’t even be able to handle the needs of a young body, anything to get a reaction from me.

“Forgot something there?” I knew what he was implying, and even though it couldn’t be further from the truth, I couldn’t find it in myself to explain just yet. Terror made my heartbeat clear and quick on my ears, and I hated it. It wasn’t a feeling that was familiar, but considering it truly belonged to someone else, it was just beyond irritating.

“Something like that.”

Stepping on the pedal as I was once again flooded with a panic that didn’t belong to me, I found myself praying I’d be able to make it there in time to stop whatever the hell was going on. To whom I was praying, I didn’t know, just as I couldn’t explain why the hell I cared.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

I squeezed my knees tighter to my body, trying to make myself smaller while attempting to control my breathing at the same time. It wasn’t easy, especially since my heartbeat was all over the place.

At least the screaming has subdued. Although that did little to appease my concern, it did help in my task of hiding in this safe room inside the empty basement. Just before Bobby managed to shove me in here, the last thing he told me was to keep quiet and still until someone came to get me, but now that his voice had been gone for a while and he still hadn’t reappeared, I doubted anyone would come looking for me.

Still, I couldn’t find it in myself to uncurl my body from this somewhat calm-inducing position and actually step out of the room to go explore the house. Not when I could still remember so clearly what I found when my dad was murdered. And I couldn’t see the same done with Bobby. I just couldn’t. Not when that meant that I was completely alone, with no one to worry about me in this entire world.

Tears rose, prompting me to blink them away, scared that once I allowed myself to grieve, I wouldn’t be able to stop. This wasn’t the time or the place. My life could very well still be in danger. And I couldn’t let Bobby’s… disappearance be for nothing. No. He put himself at risk for me, I’d abide by his wishes.

First things first, I’d stay right here, not moving a muscle. If nothing came to find me, then I’d slowly make my way out of this hiding spot… once I deemed it was safe enough to do so. 

But for now, there wasn’t much I could do, other than focus on my breathing and keep quiet. Real quiet. And watch time slowly go by. Praying that if something did come to find me, it would come in with a friendly face.

John’s P.O.V.

“Shit.” It was all I said as I barely managed to park the car right outside Bobby’s place before leaping out of it. It was pretty obvious something had happened over here, if not by the fact that the front door was slammed open, at least by the tracks of something that had been dragged over the front lawn, looking too much like a body not to make every single nerve end on my body stand to attention again.

At least I was feeling something again, and even if it was from my own system and not hers, I considered it a good sign. Halfway through the drive the panic that had been steadily building had completely disappeared, and I almost believed, if only for a second, something had happened to her - only to realize that if someone had killed my mate, I would have definitely known.

I still didn’t want to think about her as being my mate, but the existence of this connection between us was undeniable, especially as I bursted into the house, gun in my hand, to find blood fucking everywhere. The feelings of worry skyrocketed - I wanted to attribute them to her, but I knew they were mine. Just what the fuck had happened here and where the fuck was her?

I could hear the boys walking around the house behind me. I couldn’t give them any attention. My mind was occupied with her and only her, needing to know that she was safe, almost desperate to know where the heck she was. 

Bobby was a smart man. If he had noticed even an inkling of something going South, he’d have found a way to protect her. I just had to figure out what it was. Gun still in hand, although it was pretty clear that whatever it was that had been here had left long ago, I encircled the sofa and started to make my way down to the basement, remembering a conversation I’d had with Bobby one of the many times I came to visit.

“There’s an old closet in the back of the room downstairs,” he’d said. “It’d make for a good panic room, if I ever ended up having something I needed to keep safe.” Despite never having seen it, it wasn’t too hard to find it once I managed to turn on the lights. It really was made to be imperceptible for someone who wasn’t looking for it, but since that wasn’t my case, the difference in the wood texture of the walls sorely jumped out to my eyes, and I reached out to curve the barely existent nail of my thumb on the indentation until I was able to pull it open. 

And there she was.

She was asleep, head resting on her knees, tucked away into the corner of the closet-sized room. A sigh of relief fell out of my mouth before I could reel it in, my heart clenching at the adorable sight before I snapped myself out of it. Fuck, no. This wasn’t any sentimental mate shit. This was me, worried about another living human being - one that had been placed under my friend’s care after having lost her entire family. That was all there was to it.

Still, I was careful when I reached out to put a hand on top of her, hoping it would suffice to pull her from her slumber. What I wasn’t expecting, however, was for that fucking connection to call out at the feeling of her skin under my calloused fingers, her eyes snapping open in shock and her mouth opening in clear intent to scream her lungs out.

“Shhhh… It’s just me. Shut the fuck up,” I groaned, one hand clasped over her mouth as I pulled her up with me and drag us out of the panic room. From the corner of my eye, I could see the boys had caught on to what had happened, and were clearly relieved to see her safe, despite the lack of indication as to where Bobby could be. 

After the initial shock, she finally stopped mumbling against my palm and took a deep breath, probably taking in the reality of the situation. It was just us. No immediate danger around.

I don’t think she even noticed when I slipped out from behind her, finally uncovering her mouth so I could try to understand what the hell had happened around here. The lack of contact between our skin, however, was sorely felt by my alpha genes, that begged me to look for her softness again, keep it close to me.

“Bobby?” Just that question made it clear we wouldn’t be getting much answers from her. Before I could say anything, Dean shook his head with an apologetic smile, and despite her falling down on a couch nearby, much to my surprise, she didn’t start crying or screaming again. If anything, she took the news (or lack of them) with quiet resignation, something that intrigued me to no end.

She’d lost everything, but instead of behaving like some poor little omega, she just accepted that this was her life now. 

“Didn’t you hear anything?” I finally asked, and had to suppress a smug grin when her eyes immediately snapped up to meet mine, easily abandoning Dean’s gaze. 

“Screams. But I couldn’t make out what was being said, it just seemed…” She hesitated then, like she needed to gather some strength to keep talking about it, but still, she pushed through. “It just seemed like they were torturing him, you know? It didn’t last long, but it was…”

She didn’t need to say it, it was easy to understand. Haunting. Devastating. I can’t imagine how it must have been like to be stuck in that spot, desperately wanting to help - because I knew it had been the case, I could feel it through our… bond, as nonexistent as it was - and being absolutely terrified about what could be waiting on the other side.

I had the overwhelming urge to wrap my arms around her, feel her body against mine again and comfort her mind with my presence. It was so strong, in fact, that I had to bury my fingernails in my palms in order to stop myself from doing that, but since the urge remained, I distracted my animalistic side with some practical tasks that needed to be dealt with.

“Okay, let’s get the hell out of here. Sam, did you pack her stuff?” Knowing my youngest had gone up to the second floor and was easily the most prepared out of all of us, it didn’t surprise me when he answered by simply holding up a duffel in his hands. “Alright, then let’s hit the road.”

Y/N’s P.O.V.

Taken by surprise and ripped from my admittedly dark thoughts, I whipped around to stare at the older man who looked like this was just another ordinary day, like he hadn’t just very clearly tried to alter the course of my existence. But instead of providing me with any sort of explanation, he just reached out for my arm and pulled me from the couch, dragging me all the way to the main floor of the house and out of it before I was able to speak again.

“Stop! Hold on!” I managed to release my wrist from his grip, but I don’t think he would have even realized I was speaking if it weren’t from the sudden lack of contact between our bodies.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” The omega in me wanted to recoil at the sight of her alpha looking at us with such anger, but he wasn’t our alpha. And he definitely had no right to come here and take control of my life like I had no say in the matter whatsoever.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” I shot back, and his mouth hung open in surprise. It almost made me feel smug about myself, knowing I had the power to shock the great John Winchester, who thought he was too good to become someone’s mate, but I was too angry to even acknowledge that. “You can’t just come in here and take me away, that’s not how it works.”

“I’m trying to keep you safe.” From the little I knew of him, considering our limited encounters and the stories Bobby and other hunters had told me about, I knew he was a man of few words, but even my irate state of mind could identify the warning bells on the way he uttered that simple sentence, paired with the sight of the veins on his forearms as he clenched his hands into fists.

Still, I pressed on.

“Who gave you that responsibility? Bobby was my godfather, my father trusted him, I know next to nothing about you. In fact, I want to keep knowing next to nothing about you. Just the same as you want when it comes to me, I’m certain.”

Waves of anger radiated from him, and even Sam and Dean seemed tense from a distance, where they stood by the car, watching our altercation. Guess seeing their dad this furious wasn’t as usual as I figured it would be, considering the Alpha inside of him.

“Why is it so hard for you to just obey? Get inside the car. I’m not gonna ask you again.” Of course, he could have made me obey, if he wanted to. One order from their alpha and any omega would fall to their knees, the genetic pull too strong to ignore. But he didn’t use his alpha voice, he used his John voice, and if at first that surprised me, believing it to be from a place of respect, the realization that it was most likely because he didn’t want to recognize that our bond even existed only filled me with even more anger.

“I am not getting in that car with you.” I braced myself for what he could do, trying to harden my soul so it wouldn’t hurt to see him leave - that’s what I wanted, right? - while also preparing to fight if he finally relented and took advantage of his manipulation power, but there was just no way I could anticipate him shortening the distance between us and easily throwing me over his shoulder like I was nothing more than a sack of potatoes. 

John’s P.O.V.

Fucking stupid ‘mega. Is she actively trying to get herself killed? Everyone around her has died in the last few months, what makes her think she can survive on her own? Why the fuck couldn’t she just be a good fucking girl and obey me? I hated that I had to resort to this, I hated having to touch her again, and especially have her over my shoulder, where I could feel the smell of her hair as it fighted against the wind and she tried to punch my back.

I grunted as I deposited her on the copilot seat, immediately locking the door so she wouldn’t be able to run away. The boys took their places in the backseat while I made my way to the driver’s seat, and although Dean didn’t look all that happy to be confined back there, it couldn’t come close to the burning expression with which she regarded me.

“Don’t you look at me like that,” I growled. “You’re coming and that’s final.”

“You don’t want me! Why are you taking me with you?” She was nearly yelling by then, arms waving around like a lunatic, and I had to to grind my teeth together so I wouldn’t reach out and…

I don’t know what I wanted to do, to be honest. I just knew that my head was pounding and I could still fill the weight of her body over my shoulder, like her skin had burned the fabric of my shirt and imprinted the shape of her body on my soul.

“You must be really fucking stupid if you think I’m gonna leave you out there, all alone.” That, thank the lord, was enough to shut her up, but I figured out pretty soon that she didn’t need to open her mouth to find new ways to annoy me.

“Driver picks the music,” I warned, lightly slapping her hand when she reached for the radio, but the infuriating little thing only slapped mine back and changed the station anyway.

“Maybe on a road trip. If you don’t want this to be recognized as a kidnapping, it’s the least you can do.” God, she was infuriating. I clenched my hands on the wheel, mulling the words I wanted to say over my head and I still wasn’t able to stop the threat from spilling.

“I swear to God, I’m not above pulling over and spanking you until you’re not able to walk for a whole week.” The second her eyes met mine, I knew trouble was coming my way, and still I was unprepared when the next words fell from her lips.

“And you think that’s punishment?” I couldn’t help it, the question provoked me into thoughts I definitely did not want to be having about her, my ears burning up as I realized that she could very easily read my reactions to figure out what was going on through my head - especially since my eyes automatically trailed over her body.

“You know what? I changed my mind. Take me wherever you’d like.” And with that, she threw one leg over the other, a dangerous smile taking over her face. “I think you and I are gonna have a lot of fun together, John Winchester.”


	3. Chapter 3

John’s P.O.V.

“Little princess is too good for a beer?” A week had passed since she joined us on the road and still, her effect on me was much too strong to deny it. In fact, it seemed to only grow stronger each day. But of course, I pushed through, kept pretending things weren’t different (even though that was ridiculous), like I wasn’t different.

At least, I’d figured out one way to deal with it - deal with her, and it was getting on her nerves just as much as she got on mine. But even I had to admit that in that game, she was much better than I could ever be.

“I actually prefer scotch.” My jaw dropped when the bartender - who usually didn’t leave his station to serve anyone - came all the way to our table to deposit her drink in front of her. When she realized my surprise, she just winked before taking a sip of the amber liquid.

“You are unbelievable,” I commented, shaking my head to make it sound more like a complaint and forcing myself to avert my eyes from her, so I wouldn’t be caught staring. It definitely wouldn’t help with anything.

“You bicker but you’d miss me if I went my separate way.” I sputtered and had to abandon my beer before I actually went through the humiliating ordeal of choking on the liquid because of her. I didn’t want to think about her leaving, and I definitely didn’t want to think about why it was so hard for me to think about that.

“You wish.” That was the best I could come up with, and still, it wasn’t enough, I knew, and she knew, and the boys knew, but no one said anything. I just had to stand there and accept the fact that she was wearing that smug fucking smile and it was all because of me.

I almost wasn’t mad about it. As much as I hated to admit it, it made her so fucking sexy, especially when paired with the little skirt she decided to wear to the bar tonight. I have no idea why Sam decided to pack that thing out of all the clothing she had, but damn if I wasn’t grateful for it.

I’d stopped giving myself a hard time over admitting that she was attractive. Yes, she was young, and no, I definitely was nowhere near giving in and claiming her, but a man can look. And I knew I wasn’t the only one doing that tonight.

“Fuck, you’re hot.” I whipped around fully prepared to launch onto the poor unfortunate soul that decided to test their luck tonight, but was taken by surprise by two things. First, the fact that instead of being disgusted or angry, Y/N opened up the biggest smile at the stranger, and then promptly threw herself on his arms. Second, he was almost as tall as me, and built like a fucking wall.

This was no ordinary Alpha, that much was easy to notice by his smell. And if that somehow escaped someone’s attention, the leather jacket with an emblem on the back spoke for itself.

He was the head of a gang. The Alpha of a pack.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

“James!” I yelled over the bar’s noise, incredibly excited to see him after so long. It’d been… what? Three years since that faithfull summer that we spent together, and he still was able to provoke the same reactions in me.

But I guess it could be said for any omega who had the luck to catch his attention. He was top of the chain, after all - the Alpha anyone would want for them, be it as a mate or as a leader, and the last time we saw each other, he confessed the only one he wanted was me.

“James? Who the fuck is James?!” Of course, as another true and primal Alpha - and one from an older generation than the guy whose hands were still around me - John felt threatened by his presence close to us.

I insisted on not reading it as something about jealousy because it’d been over a week already and as much as he’d accepted and even countered some of my teasing, it was clear John Winchester had absolutely no intention to claim me. I doubt he even found me attractive at all.

“Probably the only person who can flirt with me like that and not get slapped on the face,” I answered John’s question, but kept my gaze on James. It’d been so long. I wondered if he still felt the same way…

“Your scent has changed.” The low murmur by my ear, paired with the way his thumbs rubbed my hips, told me everything. He knew I’d found my mate. He knew I could be claimed now.

“Is he an old boyfriend, Y/N?” Dean, bless his heart, tried to cut the tension in the room while I remained frozen from the words James had said, wondering if this was it, if he’d claim me and take me away from the Winchesters and the humiliating feeling of being rejected.

Despite all of the times we’d joked about it, all of the times he complained about me still needing to find my mate so he could finally have me, I never actually considered it would ever happen. I really thought I would be the one-in-a-million omega who actually ended up with their Alpha, their true mate. Who actually ends up with the guy they lose their virginity to? Princesses in fairytales, that’s who.

I’d also never pictured myself as part of a gang, something that would certainly become inevitable if I got married to the leader of one. Just thinking about it made me feel overwhelmed, and I suppose that wasn’t a good sign of the toughness necessary to be in a gang.

But just as all of those thoughts ran through my head, John Winchester had to say something to piss me off to the point of acting stupid. “As if. Look at him. She’d never go for someone like him.”

I flinched, mind racing as I thought of all the things I could to stop a fight from happening, but much to my surprise, the man behind me laughed, fully laughed, like there was something in John’s comment I couldn’t catch.

“She already has, pal.” A lot of things happened in the second after James nonchalantly announced our past to my new travel companions, hindering my ability to think in the already heavy situation.

First, John’s eyes immediately fell on me. I could feel the weight of his gaze on my body, just like I always did whenever he looked at me. I absentmindedly wondered if it would keep happening if I ended up going with James, if this… calling I felt towards him would suddenly disappear. As much as I wanted to believe it would, I also felt a slight sense of disappointment when I thought about not being in any way connected to him anymore, as stupid as that felt.

Second, James whispered in my ear that he couldn’t believe John thought of me as some goody-goody two shoes. “If only he knew…” He dragged out, the warmth of his breath eliciting shivers in my spine. And that’s when I realized, John didn’t think I’d go for James because he saw me as some type of virginal, innocent little girl.

Third, the guys that accompanied James - I recognized at least the blond one from when we met - called out to him to settle some discussion they were having on the other end of the bar. And so with a nod in John’s direction, my ex lover left, leaving me to decide what to do with the fallout of what had just happened.

And what I decided was that I needed some time to figure out how exactly I was feeling after all of that, so with my own nod towards the oldest Winchester, I shrugged and mocked, “Who says I like it gentle?”, because there was no way in hell I’d let John Winchester believe I was just some innocent little flower he had to protect from the claws of the entire world.


	4. Chapter 4

I was so lost in my own thoughts - with a brief interception to wonder who the fuck constructs a bar that makes their client have to leave the building and walk all the way to the back of it just so they could use the bathroom - that I only realized the Alpha that was stalking me when he already had me against the wall, his lips fused with mine.

“James,” I quipped, hands simultaneously trying to push him away and pull him closer, undecided if this was the right thing to do even if the way my pussy ached just with his nips over my scent gland was undeniable.

“James,” I tried again, knowing if I didn’t get this out I would end up doing something I’d regret. I was too close to my own heat, and it’d been too long since I felt an Alpha’s hands on my body… The need I felt was overwhelming, but there was so much I needed to consider. “I think we should talk…”

His beard tickled me as he nuzzled against my neck, right where he’d threatened to leave a mark so many years ago. The memory brought shivers down my spine, and I gasped and grabbed fistfuls of his shirt when he licked it, my nipples instantly pebbling under my shirt as a whine fell from my lips.

“Oh, come on, sweetheart,” he countered, hands already traveling under my shirt to find just how affected I was from his caresses. “Remember how good I can make you feel?” Flashes from that summer were all I could think about when I closed my eyes and rested my head on the brick wall behind me, trying to gather some focus, trying to think. But underneath all of the confusion and indecision, one thing was overwhelmingly clear to me: after everything I’d been through with finding my true mate and having him reject me, I was reveling in the feeling of feeling desired at all.

Even if it wasn’t by the man I wanted.

“Yes, I remember,” I finally admitted, hands finally settling around James’ strong shoulders before I buried one of them in his long locks. And that was all the consent he needed to really lave me in his attention, sucking and licking my lips, my jaw, my neck, and shoulder, while his hands made quick work of my underwear.

“You won’t be needing that anymore,” he joked, quickly returning his lips to my scent gland, determined to leave me at least with his smell if he wouldn’t leave me with his mark - something I still wasn’t able to determine. As it were, I was much too occupied with other thoughts to consider anything else at that moment, so I just allowed him to kiss and nip all over my skin, my hips instinctively looking for more of his touch.

“God, I’ve been thinking about this for so long. Do you know how much I longed for you? I feel like I’ve been waiting for you all this time. I thought about you, about this sweet cunt, every single night,” he growled against my cheek as his fingers finally plunged inside of me, finding me wet and ready for him.

I tried to ignore the fact that he wasn’t the actual cause of my wetness, and that I couldn’t say the same about him. As much as I cherished my time with James, he hadn’t consumed my thoughts or fantasies - especially not since I’d seen John for the first time.

But I doubted those were his real feelings, anyway. He was probably just saying this for the sake of the fuck, or at the most, to convince me to let him mark me. There was no way this man, this Alpha, had spent so long just hung up on me. 

“Fuck, I can’t count how many times I got off to the thought of you, but now you’re here.” Oops, guess I was wrong. “Now you’re here, and we can be together. If you want. Your scent has changed, you found your mate. You can leave him behind and come with me. I promise I can make you forget all about him.”

I was so fucking sensitive from not having been touched for so long that a few thrusts of his fingers had me cumming all over his digits, a gasp that resembled his name escaping my lips as I struggled to hold myself up. The weight of James’ words, his offer, still couldn’t be processed by my orgasm-driven mind, which now that had met some sort of release, could only think of finding another.

I never even stopped to consider how James had realized that John was my true mate, but I seriously could not be bothered to care about it then. My hands were occupied with his zipper, reaching out to touch his cock - I always did enjoy how he never liked to wear boxers - while his fingers kept fucking me to another release.

I felt one of his thumbs tap my lips and instinctively sucked on them, knowing he wanted to stop my cries from reaching innocent bystanders who could be leaving the bar in search of the bathroom or the parking lot. And it was that thought that had me realizing that we were very much out on the open, where anyone could see…

And then my eyes met his.

“Don’t mind him, baby. I bet he’s only watching because he wants to know how you like to be touched. I’ll show him, huh? Maybe I’ll even let him join. Let him taste this little pussy. You’d like that, wouldn’t you?”

And just as realization struck me of what was really happening, my body starting to wiggle to push James away from me, John stepped out of the shades, his entire frame radiating waves of fury. 

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”


	5. Chapter 5

John’s P.O.V.

I could barely hear over the sound of my heart pumping blood mixed with anger and arousal through my veins. I knew it was irrational - and the rational part of me was urging me to turn around and leave while I still could - but the sight of her with him had awakened a deep, territorial, and possessive feeling I just couldn’t deny anymore.

“Get your hands off of her,” I ordered, eyes narrowed and focused solely on the man who wanted my mate. I didn’t want to look at her, didn’t want to see the emotions that were certainly dominating her expression. I knew there’d be confusion, and I knew there’d be that fire in her eyes that brightened her personality, making her so damn interesting to everyone that met her.

I just didn’t have the level head I needed to deal with her right now.

“I won’t tell you again.” The guy looked at her for a second before letting her down on the floor but then turned around to look at me with a cynical smile on his face.

“Why do you think you have any say on what happens between me and her, old man?” The question, the nickname had me curling my hands into fists while I still tried to remain as calm as I possibly could, considering how fucking angry I was.

“What sort of fucking question is that? She’s mine!”

“I don’t see a mark on her neck.” The reminder sobered me up somewhat, making me realize exactly what I had said without thinking. He was right. I had no right over her. She wasn’t mine, and I didn’t want her to be.

But I still didn’t want his hands on her. 

“You don’t want to mess with me, boy. I can really hurt you.” He immediately laughed, but when neither I nor Y/N reciprocated the reaction, the Alpha seemed to ponder my words for a second. I watched as he exchanged a look with her, and just that act of intimacy, their ability to communicate without sounds, had me burning on the inside.

“Remember what I said. You know how to get in touch with me if you need it. We can be together now. It’s up to you.” I knew my entire body trembled in the effort to contain myself as I heard his final words to her before his eyes darted in my direction again. 

“Take care of her.”

I wanted to tell him that I would, better than he ever could, but I didn’t want to imply that I believed this to be my responsibility either. So I just narrowed my eyes in his direction, watching cautiously until his form disappeared when he took a turn to get back to the bar.

“What the fuck was that?” My head snapped back to look at her, finally taking in her traits. Her eyes were narrowed at me, her own hands curled into fists and her entire body trembling under the power of her emotions. It seemed like she reciprocated my own emotions perfectly.

“You’re my mate, you shouldn’t be whoring yourself for other alphas.” My words were like a slap to her face if the way her expression fell was any indication, but I felt like I’d hit myself with that one.

I’d just admitted she was my mate for the very first time while accusing her of being a whore for looking in other alphas what I didn’t want to offer. I really was despicable. But I was too far gone in my temper tantrum to allow the self hate to take over me at that moment. And with the next words that fell from her lips, I knew there was absolutely no way I’d be able to deal with this in a calm manner - I was about to explode.

“Really? Am I actually your mate? Because you’ve never acknowledged it until now. You don’t even seem to be affected by me in any way!” My entire body trembled with barely kept anger, and still, I tried to hold on to those scraps of my usually iron-tight control.

“Of course you affect me! You’re my fucking mate, for fuck’s sake. You turn me on all the fucking time, and I’m still not convinced it’s only because of this fucking bond.” Her mouth opened and closed a few times at that like she wasn’t expecting this confession at all - fair enough, I didn’t expect to make it. And the fact that she made me so crazy that I would go against my own intentions only served to worsen my anger.

“You’re such a fucking liar.” She shook her head and crossed her arms, inadvertently making her breasts more visible over the cleavage of her shirt.

“Watch your fucking mouth,” I growled, and she had the nerve to fucking laugh!

“You’re a fucking liar and you’re just trying to keep me around like a plaything because it boosts your ego. You don’t want anything with me, John Winchester, so you should just let me go.” She approached me then, eyes showing fire as I fought to suppress my instincts.

“Shut up.” There was a heavy silence between us, one heavy with the tension that had been growing between us ever since the day we found out about the bond. But then she seemed to make up her mind over what she wanted to do about it.

“Well, you can’t make me.” But I could. I could. And so I did. I picked her up so easily that I think both of us only realized what I’d done when she was already against the brick wall of the bar, my body tightly pressed against hers.

“You’re still gonna tell me you don’t have any sort of effect on me?” She just looked up at me with those big bright eyes that said too much, and I knew what she was asking. I knew that she felt my hard member against her stomach. I knew I had interrupted her orgasm. The smell of her arousal was still swirling in the air around us, intoxicating me, hampering my ability to think straight.

And so I got carried away.

“Spread your fucking legs.” Her arms flew up to my shoulders, clutching at my shirt when my hand slipped under her skirt to find her naked and wet for me. “You’re not even wearing any underwear, huh? What, did you know you’d run into James?”

I knew the tone of mockery that I used to say his name didn’t go unnoticed by her, but she seemed as inebriated by the sounds of my fingers slipping inside of her pussy as I was. “You’re so fucking wet. I bet anyone who leaves the bar can hear the squelching sounds of your whorish behavior, did he get you this wet?” 

Unfortunately, she didn’t answer me, and I wasn’t a man who liked to be ignored, as she was about to find out. “Answer me,” I ordered, gripping her jaw so she’d look me in the eye.

“Oh, fuck,” was everything she could give me, but it made me smirk, so I let her off the hook - this time.

“You wish,” I meanly ridiculed. “You wish I’d fuck you. Believe me, if I did, you wouldn’t live the same way ever again. You wouldn’t even be able to walk after I was done with you. I wouldn’t stop until I was 100% sure you would never open your legs for any other man.”

Her little gasp was swallowed by my mouth when I licked her lips open, digits curling up and tapping against the spot that had her whining against me. “You’re such a goddamn fucking tease,” I continued once I let her gather her breath. “Is this what you wanted, huh? You wanted to cum all over his fingers?”

I felt her tugging on my shirt, still unable to voice her thoughts. I knew I was in for it when we were done, I knew she’d rip me apart for everything I’d said, everything I’d done, but I couldn’t pretend to care at that moment.

“Fucking brat,” I mocked, picking up the pace of my fingers as I felt her approach her high. “Beg me to make you cum. Beg me.”

“P-please.” A satisfied smirk took over my face at hearing just how wrecked she was, her eyes glossed over as she looked up at me. 

“He thinks I don’t know how to touch you, huh? What would he think if he saw you cumming around my fingers right now, like he never even touched you?” I felt her tighten around my digits, announcing her orgasm even before she cried out and gripped my shirt in desperation.

“He can’t satisfy you.” It was more of a realization that hit the both of us at that second when she finally stopped convulsing. “Not the way I can.” We just stared into each other's eyes for a few seconds, the moment heavy with words unspoken that couldn’t be uttered now that the moment was gone.

Her pussy clung to my fingers, like she didn’t want me to leave her empty when I pulled my hand away from the edge of her skirt. “You’re sweet,” I commented, having sucked on the juices there before looking at her, holding herself up by the way, slightly trembling, chest heaving with the effort to breathe.

Something red caught my attention, and I looked down to the floor to find the scraps of what had obviously been her underwear. Chuckling, I knelt to pick it up before stuffing it into my pocket.

“If he didn’t want it…” I shrugged, giving her one last look before turning around and going back to the bar.


	6. Chapter 6

Y/N’s P.O.V.

Things changed ever since that night at the bar, even if in all the ways that mattered, they were still pretty much the same. John still didn’t claim me and seemed resolute in never doing it, but I knew something very important now.

I knew that he actually desired me. And that important information changed everything for me. His indifference was hurtful, and it ignited the flames of spite inside my bratty omega body. But knowing that he actually was affected by me made me even more determined to get any sort of reaction from him. And I could tell that now that his resolve had been broken once, it was even easier to get him to snap again.

“Good morning!” I sang as he and the boys joined me in the kitchen, having already prepared the coffee and was now flipping pancakes to feed their insane hunger. “Have you slept well?”

Dean and Sam answered affirmatively, but John only grumbled. I knew he was trying very hard not to stare at my ass on the tiny sleeping shorts I was still wearing.

“There you go,” I offered them the plate with the mountain of pancakes and stepped away as each of them collected theirs, so I wouldn’t lose a finger in the process. Thankfully, they were polite enough to leave me at least three so I could join them for breakfast. “Is there any reason for you to be staring at me?” I asked, obviously directing my question to John, whose gaze I could feel burning my body, despite my focus being 100% on my own plate. 

The situation reminded me too much of the morning after we met, and it was hard to keep the smile off my face.

“I’m trying to understand who the hell would put on makeup right after they woke up. And can’t I look at you anymore? Why are you smiling like that?” A giggle escaped my lips, finally raising my eyes to see his furrowed eyebrows and just how overall irritated he looked at absolutely nothing.

“Can’t I smile anymore?” I parroted his response, and that earned me a growl. “Wow, you’re very easily annoyed this morning. What’s wrong? Is your rut coming up?” That seemed to be the wrong thing to say, if the way he almost broke his mug when putting it back on the table was any indication. “Jesus, calm down… For your information, I’m not even wearing any makeup.”

Instead of angry, John paled at my words, freezing for a second with his eyes wide before leaving all at once. I had to blink a few times to process the unexpected turn of events before I could look at the boys for some sort of explanation.

Still, neither of them looked as confused or startled by John’s sudden outburst as me. Dean was even chuckling to himself, attention completely dedicated to his food as he said, to no one in particular, “You two bicker like teenagers… or an elderly couple that’s been married for years.”

That comment kinda hurt, because it made me realize that there was a gigantic probability of me never having that actual future with him. So I turned to Sam, hoping he would distract me from my sad thoughts and provide me with some answers.

“Do you know what this is about?” He frowned when he noticed I was talking to him, like he wasn’t expecting my question. But then he noticed the genuine confusion on my face, and he seemed to understand that I really didn’t know what was going on.

“Oh, I thought you had picked up on it,” he commented, swallowing a huge bite of pancakes. “He really is nearing his rut. That’s why he’s acting this way, and that’s why your presence is that much more aggravating to him.”

The explanation was surprisingly a shock to me. Despite my teasing, I never actually thought that was the reason for his prickly behavior, and now that I knew what it was, I couldn’t help but to be concerned for him.

“Shouldn’t he be out there, looking for someone to help him get through it?” I asked, even if the thought of John with another woman killed me. I could only imagine the sort of pain an Alpha went through when they had to survive a rut on their own. And even if I didn’t understand why he didn’t want to claim me, I would never wish him to hurt.

I remembered just how bad my first heat had been. It was the only one I’d faced until now, the one where it became clear I was in fact an omega, and since I wasn’t prepared, I spent the most terrible three days dehydrating in my own room, getting by with just my own fingers and toys, until it subdued just enough to let me get some water and food into my system.

Omegas weren’t meant to go through heats alone, just as Alphas weren’t, either.

“He’s been going through them by himself ever since mom died.” My eyes grew the size of the plate in my hands, I was sure of it, just as my mouth hung open to stare at the man in front of me. He started laughing at my reaction but still somehow kept on swallowing down his food.

“What? You think he’d just bring a random chick into the bunker? Especially now that you’re here? No way. He’d never disrespect you like that.” The fact that Sam just knew that his father would take my feelings into consideration overwhelmed me. I didn’t know what to say, so I silently excused myself to wash the dishes and go back into my room.

“Damn, it’s hot,” I thought to myself as I looked at the sweatpants I’d planned to change into and decided to keep the shorts I was currently wearing. “Wonder if there’s a heatwave coming our way.”


	7. Chapter 7

John’s P.O.V.

I groaned as a new wave of warmth took over my body, prompting me to get rid of my shirt and undershirt. Fucking rut. It’d been years since it was this bad, but I guess the existence of a new mate had my body struggling to control itself.

Just the thought of her had me reaching out for the back of a chair in an effort to keep myself up. I was hardening inside the jeans I was wearing, and she wasn’t even near to justify this reaction. The boys had convinced her to join them for some drinks at the bar, and if I was feeling at least a little better, I’d be with them, making sure she wouldn’t just end up in the claws of some random Alpha… even if it was stupidly egoistic of me.

I knew she had every right to search for what I wasn’t willing to give her, but I still struggled to accept it on a biological level. My instincts were constantly calling out to her, wanting to bend her body over the nearest surface and just take…

… what I didn’t have any right to own. God, this was awful. I was being awful, and I knew it. But still, especially right now, with my alpha impulses threatening to take over me, all I wanted was her. More than desire, I needed her. And as that urgency became more pressing, I found myself reaching out for my nightstand, my rough hands easily finding the soft fabric I had hidden here for a time like this.

“This should help,” I thought to myself before I unzipped my jeans and took a seat on the only chair in the room, staring at my bed with her panties curled around my hand as I imagined her there. “Why do you have to be so goddamn intoxicating?” I groaned out loud, instinctively raising the fabric to my nose and breathing her in. I still could barely believe that I’d had my fingers inside of her, swirling in her wetness, making her drip between her thighs.

Just the thought of it made my mouth water.

I was so lost in the sensation of her still dampened fabric against my member, my eyes closed as I breathed through my mouth in an effort to imagine her here, I didn’t realize her scent was becoming stronger. I didn’t realize it until my door slammed open.

“Oh… Oh my God!” She whispered, eyes taking in the entire situation - my nude body, her underwear on my fist, as it was curled around my cock, the scent of my rut drenching the bedroom, I was certain. 

“Come here,” I ordered, my voice hoarse and my eyes barely open as the smell of her own state took over me. “Strip.” She did so without any hesitation, walking into the room and closing the door behind her before getting out of her short shorts and top, her nipples hardening in the humid air of the room. “Not wearing any underwear,” I mocked, only to see her eyebrows raise high as she stared at the panties in my hand.

“Seems like a good opportunity to remind you that you never gave those back to me.” It made me chuckle, her still persisting innocence, but I shut her down quickly.

“And I never will. Now shut up and lay down on the bed.” I knew I was being harsh, but it was taking every single bit of my control not to snap and just take her. This was the best I could do, especially seeing her bare before my eyes for the first time.

She looked behind her to check on the bed before turning back to me as if confirming that was what I really wanted. I knew where she was coming from - beds for omegas were almost sacred, the place where they built their nest and that brought them the biggest sense of safety and comfort - but my need to have her there was growing each second she hesitated.

“Go,” I ordered, nodding once as I watched her take a seat on the soft mattress, body in front of mine. “Spread those legs for me.” Her eyes trailed down my body as she abided by my wishes, exposing her wet folds to my hungry gaze. God, she looked delicious. I wanted nothing more than to kneel before her and lap every single drop of her sweetness.

I could still remember the way she tasted. More delicious than anything I’d ever had the pleasure of trying. I knew I’d never forget it, but right at that moment, with her scent taking over my room, the thought of ever coming even close to forgetting her and her arousal was nothing short of ludicrous.

I squeezed my member right as it started throbbing in my fist from the lack of attention. She seemed hypnotized by it, and I licked my lips at the prospect of her being as fascinated by the thought of my knot as I was about her and her little cunt.

“Tell me what you’d like me to do to you,” I demanded, absolutely transfixed by the sight of her playing with herself on top of my bed.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

It felt right, being there with John, baring my body and soul to him in such an intimate way. There was not an inch of me that felt embarrassed or intimidated by my nudity under his transfixed stare. If anything, it made me even more aroused.

“I want you to fuck my mouth,” I admitted before I could even realize what had escaped my lips. John’s smirk didn’t leave me much room for self-doubt, though. It was clear this was exactly what he wanted, me in my most vulnerable state, revealing my deepest desires to him.

“Oh, yeah? You’d like that?” The sight of him licking his lips was incredibly erotic in all of its simplicity, and I threw my head back, exposing my neck as I fucked myself faster.

“Fuck yes. I want to choke on your cock. I want you to leave me a whiney, spitting mess.” A low rumble reverberated in the room, undoubtedly coming from his exposed chest as he looked ready to pounce on me.

“Oh, don’t doubt it for a second that I would. What else?” The roughness in his voice had me whining as more juices covered my fingers, and I had to bite my lip as I saw his thighs clench.

“Want you to fuck me,” I added, words coming harder and harder as I fucked myself in front of him. “Want you to stuff me with your cock until I can’t walk anymore. Want you to be the only thing I remember… The only thing…” My legs started to shake as I cried out, interrupting myself as I struggled with my orgasm.

“God, you’re such a fucking tease.” His voice pierced through the cloud of pleasure I was currently riding, still stuck between wanting to cum and wanting to prolong this feeling as much as possible. “Even on my bed, completely naked, with your little fingers inside that wet fucking pussy, you’re still nothing but a needy brat.”

The words had me moaning out loud, and I was sure I’d be thinking about why later. Right then though, there was no way in hell any rational thought could be held in my aroused state of mind. I was practically humping my own digits as he commanded, “Let go for me, c’mon. Cum all over those fingers.”

It was automatic. Just as soon as his words were out, I felt myself clenching, the room suddenly spinning from the force of my orgasm. I was sure it never came close to the one he could give me if he were to fuck me right then and there.

“Yeah, just like that… Now tell me, little brat… How would you like me to fuck you? Would you want me to be slow and passionate?” His words were mocking, but I was too out of it to notice. I’d stopped moving as I waited for my sensitivity to calm down, but he didn’t like that. “Keep fucking yourself.” He didn’t need to use his Alpha voice to have me instantly obeying him. “Now tell me.”

“I… I’d want you to be rough.” A growl escaped him from my admission, and it had me whimpering in return. God, I wanted nothing more than for him to have his way with me, turn me around, and take me on my hands and knees until I was begging him to stop.

“Fuck, you’re hot.” And that was how I realized I’d been voicing my deepest desires out loud. I was close to cumming again, but contrary to the time he touched me, tonight he seemed to want me to cum as many times as possible. “I’d have to use my fingers to stretch you open. There’s no way I’d be able to fit my knot without fucking you open before.”

Just his words were enough to have me reaching another orgasm, and I closed my eyes to relish it as another satisfied gasp escaped my lips. A groan pierced through my hazy mind, along with another order, “I know you can get louder. Fuck yourself faster, fucking scream for me.”

And just like that, he was able to coax yet another orgasm out of me. Or maybe it was the same one, I couldn’t tell anymore. I felt like I was drunk, just on the atmosphere of the room, the smell of sex, and the way my own juices ran down my thighs…

“Yes, that’s it… Soak my sheets, real nice…” His words had me clenching around my digits every single time. “Yes… such a good girl for me…” I watched him fist himself, his jerking motions faster and faster as he watched me come apart over and over again right before his eyes.

One thing was sure, he’d be smelling me for days. The way I drenched his bed would certainly have him surrounded by me for the remainder of his rut, and just the thought of him laying down on it had me going crazy. 

But nothing could compare to the sight before my eyes, the way he threw his head back and closed his own eyes as his fist got even quicker before stopping altogether, his body becoming covered in his own release. 

My mouth watered at the sight. I wanted to crawl to him and lick him all over, maybe even wrap my lips around the head of his dick and suck it until I made him moan my name out loud.

“I keep wondering what your lips taste like…” His voice broke me out of my thoughts, and I noticed his own gaze was stuck on the apex of my thighs. “Both pairs.” There was silence then, a heavy, sexually-tense silence that had my entire body buzzing with excitement.

Was this it? Would he finally take me and make me his?

“Get out of my bed.” His next words, the cold tone in which they were uttered made my head snap up to meet his gaze. Contrary to what it was just seconds before, it was empty and detached, like he wasn’t even seeing me anymore.

“What?” I asked, still paralyzed from the whirlwind of emotions.

“Out. Get out of my bed. Go to your room and lock the door. Now.” I waited a few more seconds to see if he would change his mind yet again, but as he avoided my eyes and stood up to go to his bathroom without as much as glancing at me, my decision was made.

I needed to get the hell out of there.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think there’ll be just one more chapter to this story, but I don’t know if it’s coming next week!

John’s P.O.V.

“Omega.” The sound of her title made her stop in her tracks, but she still didn’t turn around to face me. It’d been like this for the last month or so. A game of hide and seek I had never agreed to play.

Although I was pretty sure if I asked her about it, she’d say I was the one who made up the rules in the first place.

“What do you want, John?” Hearing her address me directly after so many days of tense silence was inebriating, but her tone wasn’t what I wanted. I knew I deserved it though, and that is why I was subjecting myself to this.

“I want to talk.”

“That’s precious coming from you. Take such pride in being the silent, angry type. Or should I say the asshole type?” I scoffed, even though I deserved that. I deserved it all, I knew it. 

But what I’d come to realize in these last few weeks that I had to endure practically without her was that I was nothing but a selfish bastard when it came to the woman before me.

“Would you just hear me out?” I asked, pulling the basket of dirty laundry she was holding and letting it fall on the floor before forcing her to turn around and look me in the eyes. She immediately crossed her arms in front of her, showing in every way she could that she was not in the mood to have any sort of conversation with me.

“Why should I? We’re not friends, you’re not my mate, as you’ve made abundantly clear by the way you’ve been treating me ever since we met. I don’t owe you anything, John Winchester. Much less time or even more of my energy.” Her words were like a slap to my face, and in my surprise, I let her pick up the basket and continue her walk towards the laundry room once more.

But not before I heard her last words. “Believe me, if I had anywhere else to go, I would have left a long time ago,” she mumbled almost to herself. “You must think I have no self-esteem whatsoever.”

That one hurt. It hurt because it was clear by the pain in her own voice that it was the truth. She would have left the bunker, she would have left this life behind without ever looking back because of the way I’d been treating her.

I couldn’t deal with that. So instead of accepting that reality, irritation coursed through my veins at the thought of her ever leaving.

“What about James?” I inquired, following her down the hall and finding her loading her clothes in the machine. She only turned around to face me after she was done with the task, crossing her arms once more as she leaned against the metal.

“What about James?” Y/N questioned, raising an eyebrow at me. “You’re not seriously suggesting you’d like me to join a gang, are you?” I didn’t have anything to say. I didn’t. I didn’t want her going anywhere, much less with him.

Suddenly, I was all too tired. I think it was visible because I deflated. My shoulders slumped, I looked down at my own feet as I rested my hands on my hips. “No, I’m not.” A short silence followed, and when I looked up at her again, it was to find her mouth-slacked, staring back at me.

“What?” At my question, she immediately shut her mouth before reopening again and then frowning. It was like she couldn’t decide if she wanted to say something or not. Finally - unfortunately - the latter option seemed to be the one she chose.

“Nevermind.” She turned around to fiddle with the buttons of the machine, like it wasn’t already on, and I knew what this was. This was a way out, an invitation for me to leave and let this conversation die like it had never even existed in the first place.

But I was tired.

“It’s hard to relax around you.” That was how my admission started, and even though it wasn’t planned, I didn’t hate it. I didn’t immediately feel like retreating, retracing all of my steps until suddenly I was out of the room and away from my own feelings.

No, I couldn’t run from them anymore. Not if I had any chance of making her want to stay.

“Why?” The question wasn’t unexpected, but it still made me sigh. I really hated making myself vulnerable, and any instance of sharing my thoughts and feelings felt like it for me.

“Well, first because every single part of my being is asking me to bend you over whatever’s nearest and just take you.” Our eyes met for the first time since I started really talking, and the meeting of our gazes was heavy, but not unwelcome. I’d take any sort of connection with her, any show of her willingness to forgive me. “Shit, you just have no idea how attractive you are.”

The corner of her lips turned up at my words, betraying just how much she liked to know about her effect on me, and I couldn’t help but mirror it as I kept going.

“And it’s not just because you’re my mate either,” I confessed, watching the surprise shine through her features. “It really is… you. And it’s so hard to control my reactions to you. I always get carried away, because I crave… I crave to be with you on a cellular level.”

I took a deep breath before finishing what I needed to say, the hardest of my admissions. “You’re the only one I want now, I know that. But I can’t accept that yet.” 

“Why?” So maybe I was wrong. This was the hardest thing to confess, the hardest truth I’d have to face. This is what I’d been trying to run from, ever since that morning when she told me off. 

Because I couldn’t forgive myself for it. And I feared the moment that she knew, she’d hate me forever. But it was time to say it.

“Because I know you, Y/N. I met you when you were still a kid, I played with you, I put you on my lap and made you giggle. You used to play with my beard and tell me I looked like a werewolf. I can’t just let that go.”

I braced myself for her reaction, anticipating the very worst. But she only looked at me with an amused smile, her arms crossed in front of her and her head tilted. “You feel bad about wanting me because you knew me as a kid.” Well.. yes. Was she really expecting a confirmation?

The chuckle she let out from under her breath warned me that she didn’t. Still, I couldn’t help but tightly hold onto my fears as I watched her slowly approach me, arms falling to the sides until she was within reach of mine.

“I think it’s clear I’m not a little girl anymore, John.” Well, she wasn’t wrong, and the effect she elicited on me just by holding our hands together showed just as much. “And the man I met, the man that held me on his lap when I was a kid, is not the same that’s staring at me right now. You are my mate. The same can’t be said for the man from back then.”

My entire body buzzed with electricity from the connection of our hands, and the realization that she didn’t hate me. Through her eyes, I could see there was a way for us to get through this, a way for me to somehow move past my own past.

I noticed the familiar twinkle of mischief in her eyes before she even opened her mouth to break the moment. “I think you should just admit that you want to kiss me.”

Chuckling, my hands instinctively let go of hers to find a hold on her waist, pulling her closer to me. “What good will that bring me?” But the little rascal just shrugged.

“I dunno. I might do it.” No other words were necessary. My body acted of its own accord, and I cradled her face with my palms before bending down to meet her lips, chuckling to myself once we parted and I realized she had to stand on her tip-toes to reach me.

“Well, that was a sweet first kiss,” I commented, rubbing my nose on hers and appreciating her little giggle. “The kind of sweet I’d hoped the first time I got to touch you would be. But you just wouldn’t let me have that, now would you?”

Silence took over my teasing, and I watched as she took a deep breath before saying what was on her mind. “You know… I wouldn’t mind being your secret if that’s the only way I could have you.”

I knew it wasn’t her intention, but it felt like a punch to my stomach. Had I really been this mean? That she’d think my worst problem with our situation was that I didn’t want to be associated with her?

“I don’t want to keep you a secret,” I made sure she knew. “I don’t want to hurt you anymore.” Our lives were entwined now, I knew that. I needed her here. And I’d do whatever I needed to make her stay.

“Guess I’ll just have to keep teasing you until you break, huh?” I chuckled, squeezing her hips a bit before finally letting her go. It was relieving to see that she understood I needed time.

My chest filled with hope as I watched her leave the room, but not before throwing me a wink over her shoulder. God, she was making me soft. It wouldn’t take much for her to get me to break.


End file.
